Monthly Archives: July 2011

I have had over 28 years of education in the Christian faith.  Wow.  When I really think about that, I’m a little overwhelmed.  And not because I’m thinking, “Dang gurl… that is a long time and you really know some stuff now,” but because, on the contrary, I am thinking, “How, after 28 years, do I know so little?”  I went to college for four years, where upon completion I was handed a piece of paper that qualified me to work in my field because I was now considered knowledgable.  I have completed more than 10,000 hours of work in the field of dance, which makes me an expert in my field by the standard of business.  I have been a teacher, in one capacity or another, for 11 years now.  And at this point I know a good deal about how to teach.  So I’m having a hard time figuring out why, after 28 years of education in the Christian faith I still wouldn’t feel confident in taking on the most convicted atheist in a battle of facts. 

And it’s not just facts that are lacking.  Recently I’ve caught myself wondering about Jesus.  Who was He?  What was He like?  What were His tendencies and how did He respond to the people around Him?  After 28 years of education, how is it that I’m not certain of the answers to these questions?  Jesus is the central character in the Christian novel.  If I don’t know Him, I mean really know Him, how can I know what’s going on in the rest of the story?

I have assumed a lot about this Jesus and this faith based on what others have told me.  Based on what I’ve learned in churches, at conferences, from peers and from family.  And don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying any of those things are bad just because they are what they are.  But something I have learned in my 28 years of religious education is that man often takes and tweaks and squeezes scripture to get out of it what he wants.  And sometimes that can leave a student of the faith with only half-truths under his belt. 

I want to know the whole truth about Jesus.  If He was really loving, I want to know for myself.  If He was really compassionate, I want to know for myself.  If He healed people and fed people I want to know for myself.  And if He said things that were offensive, told the pastors they were wrong, and was murdered as a result of jealousy… I want to know all that for myself too.  I want to know what the Gospels really say about Jesus.

I think the Gospels are easy to avoid because they are hard.  The Epistles have a good amount of encouragement running through them.  And, in my opinion, it can be easy to make an Epistle say what you want it to say, to fit your chosen lifestyle.  Not so with the Gospels.  The words of Jesus are driving.  They are forceful and at times offensive.  They call for action and response.  They are intensely challenging and difficult to ignore or argue. 

And I want to know those words.  What He really said.

So I am spending one year with Jesus.  Here’s what this commitment means:
-Every day I will read three chapters of the Gospels, in order, beginning with Matthew and going through John.
-By the end of the year, I will have read through all four Gospels 12 times.

I have already learned so much from this focused time, and I’m still only on my first time through.  I am excited that at the end of the year, while I certainly won’t be an “expert on God” or anything like that, I will know a lot more about Jesus than I do now!  I am excited for this equipping, and I’ll keep ya posted along the way.

On June 26th I made two year-long commitments.  One of those commitments was this:  For one year I will not buy any new clothes. 

I am excited and terrified all at once over this decision.  If you’re not a person who likes to shop, this might all sound a little ridiculous to you.  But if you, like me, love the feeling of running your fingers down the line of cotton/poly whatever hanging up at Urban; if you take a detour through the women’s section in Target on your way to pick up the toilet bowl cleaner on the other side of the store; if you get the shopping bag home and immediately pull the clothes out, take the tags off, and change your outfit in the middle of the day just to feel something new on your skin… then you will totally understand my decision.

Let me be up front about the fact that I don’t think there’s anything wrong with the desire for “new.”  I believe we are designed to long for newness.

“But in keeping with His promise we are looking forward to a new heaven and a new earth, the home of righteousness.”  2 Peter 3:13

“I will also give him a white stone with a new name written on it, known only to him who receives it.”  Revelation 2:17

“Him who overcomes I will make a pillar in the temple of my God. Never again will he leave it. I will write on him the name of my God and the name of the city of my God, the new Jerusalem, which is coming down out of heaven from my God; and I will also write on him my new name.”  Revelation 3:12

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and the first earth had passed away, and there was no longer any sea.”  Revelation 21:1

He who was seated on the throne said, “I am making everything new!”  Revelation 21:5

It is only in the sin-nature where the manifestation of these desires goes astray.  When I walk into a store and this feeling wells up inside of me that says, “Oh yes.  If I can get that new top right now my day will be so much better,” then I am only allowing the enemy to take the God-given longing for something better and turn it into greed and selfishness. 

So now I say, NO MORE.

Year-long commitments are so valuable.  It is a great amount of time to give to something when you really want to see change take place.  Half-way through my freshman year of college I committed to one year of no dating.  Seems odd timing maybe.  But I learned more about relationships in that year than I ever did while I was in them.  And the first man I dated after that year was the man I would eventually marry.  It was an amazing time of learning, re-prioritizing, and drawing near to the life God had for me.  I am anticipating the same type of changes in this new year-long committment.

Here are the parameters of my commitment:

-No new clothes. This includes accessories like scarves, hats, jackets, shoes, etc. This also includes clothes from consignment shops.
-This does not include new fabric, Goodwill purchases, or underwear.
-The year will run from June 26, 2011 through June 25, 2012.
-There are two exceptions to the rule: When I fully return to my pre-pregnancy pant size I will buy one or two pairs of jeans. Currently I do not have a single pair of jeans that fit me at this size. Also, new dance wear (leotards) are permitted because that is job-related.

And that’s that!  I mentioned I had made two year-long commitments.  I’ll fill you in on the other one soon enough.  I am already feeling very challenged by both decisions, and I’m really looking forward to the changes that this year will bring.